Spirituality & Buddhist Jokes

Practically every person who has ever looked into psychotherapy, spirituality or medicine understands the healing properties of smiling, laughter and humor. It's a well known scientific fact, and I don't feel it's necessary to explain the topic when it's already been done by countless others, so let's skip straight to the laughing part...

When asked what he wanted for his birthday the Yogi replied, "I wish for no gifts, only presence."

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused novocaine during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.

What do you call a schizophrenic Buddhist? Someone who is at two with the universe.

How many psychotherapists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but only if the light bulb really wants to change.

How many Zen masters does is take to change a light bulb? None, there is no light bulb. http://bit.ly/HuangPo

The waffle company created a product for Buddhists. The slogan is "Leggo my ego."

The spiritual student walked up to a hotdog stand and said "Make me one with everything."

Heard about the new Buddhist vacuum cleaner? It comes with no attachments.

Nisargadatta Maharaj loved animals and even made a pet food product called "IAMS Cat". http://bit.ly/IAmThat

Nisargadatta Maharaj wrote a Broadway play called "Thats", but it had no story.

People thought there were 2 lake monsters, but actually there's only one-ness.

Sorry, I didn't mean for my karma to run over your dogma.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

What's the difference between Peace and Nirvana? Peace became popular in the 60's and Nirvana became popular in the 90's.

What's Krishna's favorite video game? Gita Hero. http://bit.ly/Gita

Meditation - It's better than sitting around and doing nothing.

I hear that the classic fable by Aesop is being rewritten with a religious twist. The new version is called "The Torahtoise and the Hare Krishna."

Feel free to comment and add your own! :)

Who/What is a Buddha?

No individuality,
no relativity,
no duality,
no personal self,
no individual me,
no selfish mine,
no thoughts,
no mind,
no I.

Those who are free of all notions are called Buddhas.

Objectivity vs. Subjectivity

Thinking vs. silence.
Doer vs. observer.
Experiencer vs. watcher.
Time vs. timlessness.
Order vs. syncronicity.
Ordinary vs. miraculous.
Linear vs. non-linear.
Force vs. power.
Effort vs. effortlessness.
Struggle vs. ease.
Conflict vs. flow.
Fighting vs. harmony.
Violence vs. peace.
Strife vs. grace.
Dominate vs. benign.
Competition vs. co-operation.
Mine vs. ours.
Getting vs. giving.
Get vs. are.
Desire vs. desirelessness.
Neediness vs. non-attachment.
Controlling vs. allowing.
Pushing vs. pulled.
Individual karma vs. universal karma.
Me vs. All.
Mind vs. No-Mind
Duality vs. non-duality.
Thing vs. No-Thing.
Form vs. formlessness.
Individuality vs. Infinity.
Relativity vs. Absolute.
Irrelevancies vs. Reality.
Details vs. Essence.
Part vs. whole.

Life is a reflection of one's level of consciousness/awareness/truth/love.
So, how would you like to experience life?